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as need­ed
How do pirates get rid of their sur­plus booty? Yarrrrd­sale. more / comment…
I have a friend with no social skills and a Ph.D in the his­to­ry of palin­dromes. I call him Dr. Awk­ward. more / comment…
I’m done being a peo­ple pleas­er. If everyone’s OK with that. more / comment…
My wife insist­ed on whisk­ing flour into the melt­ed but­ter. I told her she would roux the day. more / comment…
Loud laugh­ing is not per­mit­ted in Hawaii. Just a low ha. more / comment…
Why did the cook­ie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long. more / comment…
What do you call a native Alaskan eye doc­tor? An opti­cal Aleut­ian. more / comment…
The adjec­tive for met­al is metal­lic. But not so for iron… which is iron­ic. more / comment…
Why can’t you take inven­to­ry in Afghanistan? Because of the tal­ly ban. more / comment…
I’ve got a friend who reck­ons he can make high cui­sine out of stock cubes. What an Oxo moron. more / comment…
What do you call a laugh­ing motor­bike? Yama­ha­ha­ha. more / comment…
Know what cheese can nev­er be yours? Nacho cheese. more / comment…