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A Mafia hit-man was arrest­ed for killing some­one in a rice field with a porce­lain fig­urine. The police said it was the first known case of a knick knack pad­dy whack. more / com­ment…
I know this farmer who spent his stim­u­lus check on baby chick­ens. Got his mon­ey for noth­ing and his chicks for free. (h/t Mark Gibbs) more / com­ment…
My friend final­ly over­came his addic­tion to Thanks­giv­ing left­overs. He quit cold turkey. more / com­ment…
I used to work at a cut­lery store, but I quit. No more Mr. Knife Guy. more / com­ment…
Who wants to watch a pup­pet show, minus the pup­pets? Let’s see a show of hands. more / com­ment…
Know why pigeon nois­es don’t echo? Because a coo sticks. more / com­ment…
The sword­fish has few preda­tors in the wild, except for the rarely seen pen­fish, which is said to be even might­i­er. more / com­ment…
I used to be addict­ed to time trav­el, but that’s all in the past now. more / com­ment…
All those small dead crus­taceans by the side of the high­way? Road­krill. more / com­ment…
The guy run­ning my town is awful. He doesn’t respond to phone calls because he only works after dark. He’s a total night may­or. more / com­ment…
My teacher said I’d nev­er amount to much because of my pro­cras­ti­na­tion. I told her, “Just you wait!” more / com­ment…
I buy all my guns from a guy they call T‑Rex. He’s a small arms deal­er. more / com­ment…