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My friend decided to start a B&B on his rabbit farm. Now he has a bunch of inn-grown hares. more / comment…

How do you get the twins’ attention, both at the same time? Shout “Hey, W!” more / comment…

My friend was a struggling artist until he decided to concentrate on sculpture. He made over six figures last year. more / comment…

The best thing about telepathy is… I know, right?! more / comment…

I asked my girlfriend if I was the only one she’s been with. She said yes, all others were either 9s or 10s. more / comment…

Therapist says, “It seems like you have an acute phobia of marriage. Do you know the symptoms?” I reply, “Can’t say I do.” more / comment…

I went to a tattoo artist who used to be a math teacher. He really did a number on me. more / comment…

I was driving my Skoda the other day and had to pull over. I noticed the Czech engine light was on. more / comment…

People aren’t born with a photographic memory. It takes time to develop. more / comment…

Know what you call it when you eat a toaster pastry without toasting it first? Pop-Tartare. more / comment…

When I get a headache around my kids, I take two Advil and keep away from them just like the bottle says. more / comment…

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership. more / comment…