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The dif­fer­ence between a gam­bler and a gar­den­er? One says “Read ‘em and weep” the oth­er says “Weed ‘em and reap.” more / comment…
My bal­loon ele­phant wouldn’t fit on the back seat of the car. So I had to pop the trunk. more / comment…
Why do scu­ba divers fall back­wards into the water? If they fell for­ward, they’d still be in the boat. more / comment…
There was a rev­o­lu­tion at the poul­try farm. It was a chick­en coup. more / comment…
What do you call it when a police offi­cer pulls over a U‑Haul? Bust­ing a move. more / comment…
What’s the best way to catch a com­put­er mouse? The answer might sur­prise you! Click bait. more / comment…
I like the name “Sat­urn.” It has a nice ring to it. more / comment…
Know why ele­phants have two tusks? It’s so they can mul­ti­tusk. more / comment…
I got a reversible jack­et for Christ­mas. I can’t wait to see how it turns out. more / comment…
A study found that farm­ers who talk to their cows get bet­ter milk. In one ear and out the udder. more / comment…
I just got food poi­son­ing from mul­li­gatawny. This stew shall pass. more / comment…
Know what it’s called when an orphan who was an only child takes a self­ie? Fam­i­ly por­trait. more / comment…