ba-dum
tss
sad trom-
bone
Click either one
as need­ed
My wife says I’m addict­ed to auc­tions but she’s wrong. I actu­al­ly stopped after going once… going twice… more / com­ment…
Did you know you can hear blood flow­ing close to the skin? You just have to lis­ten vari­cose­ly. more / com­ment…
My ther­a­pist told me that I’m inca­pable of ver­bal­iz­ing my feel­ings. Can’t say I’m sur­prised. more / com­ment…
Here’s how the doc­tors cured the invis­i­ble man: They took him to the ICU. more / com­ment…
Know what caus­es high tides? Sea weed. more / com­ment…
When peo­ple mis­spell bare­ly as bar­ley, they’re not mak­ing a mis­take. They’re just going against the grain. more / com­ment…
Back in the old days only the rich could afford auto­mo­biles while the com­mon peo­ple had hors­es. Now only the rich­est have hors­es while almost every­one has an auto­mo­bile. How the sta­bles have turned. more / com­ment…
I think there’s some­thing wrong with the cac­tus I’m grow­ing… but I can’t put my fin­ger on it. more / com­ment…
The 40 year old health care work­er who cares for new­borns start­ed ques­tion­ing her career choic­es, then flipped out and left town. Hav­ing a mid­wife cri­sis. more / com­ment…
I’m writ­ing a book on weight loss. I hope it will appeal to a wide audi­ence. more / com­ment…
You know why French snails are faster than Amer­i­can ones? L’ess car­go. more / com­ment…
Quan­tum mechan­ics: The dreams stuff is made of. (h/t Steven Wright) more / com­ment…